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Most of you know me as a motivator. I'm the person who will tell you to keep going, keep pushing, keep fighting, and never give up. Recently however, it came to mind that I might be overlooking a very important group of people who need to hear a different message. You will never hear me […] Read More

Most of you know me as a motivator. I’m the person who will tell you to keep going, keep pushing, keep fighting, and never give up. Recently however, it came to mind that I might be overlooking a very important group of people who need to hear a different message.

You will never hear me tell you to turn your back on your dream or your vision. You will never hear me tell you to turn your back on your calling or to close the door on your purpose. But, in all of my “go, go, go-ing”, I have never mentioned that sometimes it’s okay to quit.

I know you’re probably shocked to read that, but I hope you’ll hear me out. Let this post be a word to those of you who are torturing yourselves without even realizing it. Or maybe you do realize that you’re miserable, but because you’ve always heard that “quitting is for losers,” you’ve continued on, taking one miserable step after another.

I promise, I haven’t given up on motivational positivity – No, I’m not packing up my toys and going home.  But I  do want to talk about something that’s very real and may impact you at some point in your journey toward success.

Is it ever okay to quit?

Believe it or not, quitting can be an anointed process – it can actually be more positive than we’re often led to believe. For some people, it can be a life-saver.

If you want to know if it’s okay to quit, ask yourself these questions:

1) Are you trying to shove a square peg into a round hole?

Some business plans just won’t work. Some products should not be on your list. If you’ve spent the last year trying to force yourself to fit into a business model that doesn’t suit your personality or your strengths, there’s a good chance said business model is not part of your purpose. The same is true of products or services that don’t suit your niche or your areas of expertise. For example, if you have to rummage through a pile of trash and clutter just to find your laptop every time you need to send an email, it’s probably not wise to promote yourself as a professional organizer. The same is true of pretty much anything. Whether you have aspirations of being a web designer or a hairstylist, a certain amount of know-how is required in order to promote your service effectively.

Let me put it to you this way – you cannot build the business on a skill that you have not yet attained. It could still happen, yes. But if you want to build a business right now – focus on the skills you have right now. Your desire to be a successful graphic designer will not make you a successful graphic designer – you have to know what you’re doing first.

In this case, it is okay to quit. In fact, I encourage you to get off your current path and onto another — the right path for you. I call this “Survivormanning.” (Les Stroud is Survivorman. He gets dropped in the middle of nowhere, with pretty much nothing except his camera, and navigates his way back to civilization). It’s a good thing.

2) Are you hurting yourself?

Some ambitions and talents result in injury. Take running for example; if you injured her knee severely while running and your physician advised you to stop running, running a 10k the very next day would be dangerous. Yet every day, tons of people continue on in the very activity that causes them not only pain, but could result in permanent disability. They do this because they don’t want to be labeled “a quitter” or they’re afraid of who they’ll be without the dangerous activity. They may even be afraid  of trying something new. This same phenomenon can extend to work-related activities and may involve emotional or mental injuries. If you’re working in a position you enjoy, but you’re working countless hours and your family is falling apart, it’s okay to focus on the more important thing. In all actuality, most employers will not view this as “quitting.” In fact, most employers desire their staff members to lead well-balanced, happy lives. Happy employees are more productive. If your employer won’t work with you in a situation like this, it’s time to walk away. After all, when you come to the end of your life, it won’t be your coworkers by your bedside. It might not be your family — it could be any number of things. The point is, you should decide if what you’ll gain by staying is more precious to you than what you’d gain by quitting.

3) Are you being left in the dust?

Sometimes quitting isn’t quitting, it’s moving forward. If the processes you use during the course of a business day are more of a tradition than an effective system, it might be time to quit doing them. Change can be hard. Quitting on your current course of action can make you feel like a failure, especially if it means changing the way your entire company operates. But in reality, you’re becoming more efficient. If you’re doing something that feels productive, but deep down, you know it’s pseudo-work; quit. You’ll be better off in the long run.

When is it okay to quit?

It’s okay to quit if you keep trying to force yourself, your products, and your business plan into a box they’re not meant to fit inside, you’re miserable, and you’re NOT MAKING MONEY. << This will be a hard one for some people. If you’ve been in business for 6  months or more, and you don’t have any profits to show for it, what’s the point?
It’s okay to quit if you’re ultimately hurting yourself through your work ESPECIALLY if you’re not getting any support from your superiors.
It’s okay to quit if quitting will make you better at the things that really matter (if you’ve got 10 products, but only one of them sells, quit nine and focus on the one hot commodity).

This post has gotten quite long, and I promise to be back to my chipper, motivating self straightaway.  But I will say this, SOMEBODY needed that. Someone out there needs to know that some “quitters” only quit because they’re SMART.

 

Love in Him,

Tylie

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company promo 1 by Virtue Marketing on GoAnimate […] Read More

company promo 1 by Virtue Marketing on GoAnimate

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Consistency. As an entrepreneur, I've come to learn that consistency is the key component of success. I will admit, that even though I'm a CEO with a full staff of support and a plethora of tools at my disposal, and even though I'm a professional organizer and time management coach, I still let things fall […] Read More

Consistency. As an entrepreneur, I’ve come to learn that consistency is the key component of success. I will admit, that even though I’m a CEO with a full staff of support and a plethora of tools at my disposal, and even though I’m a professional organizer and time management coach, I still let things fall through the cracks sometimes. Case in point, this blog.

I spent the better part of the day working on some organizing and time management material for my second-quarter Hot Mess Masters class. In doing so, I began to think about prioritization as it pertains to consistency.

If you prioritize certain tasks, to the detriment of other tasks, those “other” tasks will fall through the cracks of consistency. Whether it’s writing a regular blog post, sending tweets, or simply taking time to shred old documents, eventually the things you’ve neglected will pile up. At that point, your lack of consistency will manifest itself as procrastination.

You see, being a professional, even being considered a “certified expert,” does not exempt you from having areas of weakness or making mistakes or letting things fall through the cracks. In fact, I would venture to say that even the most successful business people in the world make mistakes regularly. The rubber meets the road where we admit our mistakes and take steps to resolve them.

What I’m trying to say is, if you can prevent your lack of consistency from turning into full-blown procrastination, you can prevent the vicious cycle of stress that goes along with it. The busier we become, the more stuff seems to fall through the cracks and the greater our odds of slipping into a pattern of inconsistency and eventually suffering the wrath of procrastination.

Even if you consider the things that you’re doing in place of your “crack-fallen” tasks to be more important,unless you intend to write those crack-fallen tasks off completely, it will be up to you to prevent them from becoming the product of procrastination.

Don’t get discouraged, it happens to all of us. I wouldn’t be writing this blog post If I have not been convicted of my own inconsistencies while I was working on some product information earlier today.

Which brings me to the real meat of this post. Are you being consistent? Are you following through? It doesn’t matter how busy you are, if you make commitments that you struggle to keep and you’ve yet to address the problem, you’re being inconsistent.

Inconsistency makes you seem unreliable. If you seem unreliable, clients will not trust you to provide them with quality products or services, and while these things happen to all of us, the difference makers are:

1) Admitting that it happens.

2) Stopping it before it becomes a habit.

knowing something and following through on something are two different things. I know that I made a commitment to my blog posts every week. I know that the material I put these posts will be beneficial to other people and every day that passes with no blog post becomes a nagging sore spot in the back of my mind, because commitment and consistency is of vital importance to me. I’m not only hurting my clients, I’m hurting ME! Just because the other things I’m working on are more pressing at the time, it doesn’t negate the importance of previously made commitments – even if they seem kind of small.

I said all that say this, none of us are exempt from mistakes. You have the power to punch the brakes on whatever inconsistency you’re currently facing. I urge you, for the sake of your sanity and for the sake of your business:

1) Don’t make a commitment unless you are absolutely certain you can meet that commitment – even to yourself.
2) If you find here being inconsistent, take active steps to stop their inconsistency early. Don’t let it become a procrastination problem.
3) Be willing to admit to your coworkers and your clients when you let something fall through the cracks. Even if it’s something minor, like weekly blog posts.

Your willingness to admit your human nature will go a long way toward your reputation with your clients and your colleagues.

And finally – TAKE A SELF ASSESSMENT. Where have you been inconsistent in your life? Exercise, laundry, writing, bills…?  Who is it effecting? What steps are you taking to fix it?

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Where Smoke Meets Fire – Quit Your Whinin’

I see it all the time. People are very proficient in the skill. People everywhere, no matter their race, age or professional status have an incredible ability to complain. I don't care what the situation is, people complain - it's virtually impossible for all people to be pleased all the time. In fact, I'd venture […] Read More

I see it all the time. People are very proficient in the skill. People everywhere, no matter their race, age or professional status have an incredible ability to complain. I don’t care what the situation is, people complain – it’s virtually impossible for all people to be pleased all the time. In fact, I’d venture to say that it’s pretty much impossible for even a few people to be pleased all the time.

I have come to the realization that complaints are a part of our psyche — the part that wants change (or, in some cases, the part that DOESN’T want change). But here’s the thing, most people complain without even the slightest intention to DO something about whatever it is they’re complaining about.

Yes, I’m aware some things are beyond our ability to change them — but if that’s the case, isn’t complaining just whining about the inevitable?

I’m talking about complaining about things that could be remedied, altered or otherwise improved through the application of action and effort. Even big, “can’t do it by myself” things aren’t worth complaining about if you’re not going to take the action steps to change them.

Instead of running your whiner, why aren’t you out there taking action? Instead of blasting your woes on social media, why aren’t you in the middle of the action?

I know this sounds harsh, but I’m kind of tired of hearing whiners whine about every little thing from pot holes to pancakes when they aren’t willing to DO anything to resolve their problems. The way I see it, if you aren’t willing to “put your money where your mouth is” then you shouldn’t be running your mouth at all.

I am PERFECTLY FINE with people having opinions, but opinions and complaints are in two different ball parks. I am a doer, and an action taker – some might even say a quick starter. Sometimes that’s good, sometimes it’s bad — but at least it’s SOMETHING. In business it’s the action takers, the problem solvers, the go get ‘ers, the DOERS that do – the whiners accomplish a whole lot of nothing and are, what my dear husband likes to call oxygen thieves.

Complaining is not Godly. It’s not glorifying to our maker — instead it glorifies troubles. Whining is like worry’s bitter cousin, it doesn’t solve the problems of the future and instead sucks the joy out of the present.

There is a saying that we’ve all heard, “blowing smoke.” Blowing smoke is when you tell someone what they want to hear, whether it’s true or not and ESPECIALLY refers to the dribble of the mouth that has no hope of being enacted upon. In short – lies. The way I see it, complaining about everything, while simultaneously making ZERO effort to act, is the same as blowing smoke.

You see, it’s the FIRE that burns. FIRE is the source of the heat. FIRE is active and alive. Smoke is the bi-product of that action. Smoke makes  it hard to see, hard to breathe and toxifies the environment.  ACTION STARTS FIRES, Complaining just blows the smoke. Smoke that’s been created by someone else’s fire.  I’d rather be a fire starter than a smoke blower any day of the week.

I challenge you to TAKE ACTION, start your own fires. Stop blowing the smoke off someone else’s flame and ignite some action of your own. You’ll find much GREATER satisfaction in action than you will in your own hot air – I promise.

And yes, you CAN do it. You CAN light a spark… you CAN! And you better be willing to TRY. If you’re not, you’re just going to end up as one of those oxygen thieves I mentioned earlier.  You were made to DO great things, be a doer.

James 1:22 ESV
But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.

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Conditioning – What Are You Preparing For?

I live in middle Georgia. The land of "moist heat." I live in THE balmy summer capital of the world. I haven't always lived here. I grew up in east Tennessee and I have lived all over the world with my military husband. Yesterday, our local forecast changed to exhibit the possibility of snow this […] Read More

I live in middle Georgia. The land of “moist heat.” I live in THE balmy summer capital of the world. I haven’t always lived here. I grew up in east Tennessee and I have lived all over the world with my military husband.

Yesterday, our local forecast changed to exhibit the possibility of snow this week. SNOW! For those of you who live in the northern regions of the world, or in high altitudes, your immediate reaction is “big whoopdie doo” I’m sure. However, the people down here are freaking out. Now, where I grew up, snow was kind of rare. But, after moving to Cheyenne, Wyoming, for my husband’s career, snow became a regular part of life; not just snow, but SNOW. We’re talking, crazy deep, fire hydrants had to have markers, survival kit in your car, sub-arctic, I can’t feel my face, wind off the Rockies S.N.O.W. I became conditioned to the weather there. It took a while, it took exposure. It took being in the wind on a daily basis to condition my body to what true cold actually feels like. We just THOUGHT it got cold in Tennessee, and I’m sure people all over the country who are suffering temperatures of -30 degrees or colder would call our Georgia winters “warm.”

Now, when my mom or my friends say things like, “it’s freezing outside,” I often think, “it’s not THAT bad.” I can go without a jacket far more easily than I could have 12 years ago, before I ever left Tennessee.

So where am I going with all this?

Conditioning is in everything we do. We adapt to our surroundings whether we realize it or not. We adjust our ways of life to accommodate the inevitable parts of living, like the weather. We start out suffering, but over time, we get stronger – we become tough – no matter how hard the icy

wind blows. Sometimes conditioning is forced on us by the inevitable and sometimes we CHOOSE conditioning (think marathon running, or T-25 [this is my workout of choice and believe me, the wind was mighty icy when I started, but now, it's not so bad]).

My question is this – are you preparing for the worst or for the best in your life?  Are you becoming conditioned for GOOD or for BAD?

Here’s what I mean; just go with it – keep an open mind, because I’m about to make a sharp turn:

If you position yourself around Godly, successful, positive people. If you live your life in places and around people who can help you GROW, you’ll condition yourself for success.

But  if you live your life under a continuous negative cloud and everything you do or say is doom and gloom, if you spend time with people who drag you down but never build you up, if you live with fear and expect failure, you’ll be conditioned for mediocrity.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you should dump everyone you know so you can hobnob with the rich and famous — NOT AT ALL, and if you get that out of this post then you’ve got problems — or I’m just that bad as a writer.

There’s a reason we are called to let our lights shine. There is a REASON an anointing has been placed on living your life among like-minded people.  You have the power to influence people and situations just as people and situations have the power to influence you. Make sure you’re putting yourself in a position to be conditioned for GOOD. Your attitude is powerful.

Your circumstances will change. Harsh winds may blow. But – if  you’ve built a life for yourself on solid rock and you’ve spent time conditioning yourself for success DESPITE your circumstances, harsh winds will seem “not that bad” before you know it.

 

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Willpower: Is It Learned Or Innate

I've been doing lots of reading lately, for work and education mostly (Though, who am I kidding? I've always done a lot of reading, and probably always will). Recently I started spending more time researching human potential. For the most part, I want to know why some people excel where  others fail. Setting aside talent, […] Read More

I’ve been doing lots of reading lately, for work and education mostly (Though, who am I kidding? I’ve always done a lot of reading, and probably always will). Recently I started spending more time researching human potential. For the most part, I want to know why some people excel where  others fail. Setting aside talent, resources and support systems, I learned that those who excel possess an incredible will to succeed. By this I mean that group of people is disciplined, dedicated and will stop at nothing in the pursuit of their goals. This glaring difference made me wonder, “are we born with will power, or do we have to learn it?”

Here’s and interesting fact: In one study I found, conducted to deduct whether or not hyper-talented musicians were “born” or “made,” researchers discovered that talent plays a far lesser role in success than we’ve always been led to believe. Sure, some people have a propensity toward certain things, but according to the study, the only difference between the exceptional musicians and the average musicians was the time invested in practice. The exceptional group practiced nearly 4 times as much as the average students and twice as much as the students who were considered ‘very good.’ In other words, the study suggests that success has less to do with talent, and more to do with effort and drive.

So what did the exceptional group have that set them apart? Willpower. The drive and will to practice more than required and the will to put in thousands of hours of time toward the accomplishment of their goals. The study suggests that the ‘very good’ group had more will than the ‘average’ group but less than the exceptional group.

So does this mean that with the right amount of practice, we can become exceptional at anything we try? Does this mean that most any of us can be standouts in nearly any area as long as we’re willing to put in those thousands of hours of preparation?  The study seems to suggest so. I, for one, find it comforting to think that I COULD potentially be great at anything I choose to do — as long as I have the will to go above and beyond (to the tune of 10,000 + hours) in preparation.

But that doesn’t answer the question. Do we HAVE willpower when we’re born, or is it a learned characteristic?

I used to think some people had a greater propensity for willpower than others right from birth. In infants, we call it “stubbornness.” Yet, in adults (at least to a degree) we consider it a trait to be admired, “Oh, he has amazing willpower. His drive is impressive… blah blah blah.”

In my research, I learned that yes, all babies are born with a propensity toward accomplishment of goals – willpower – and that propensity is either cultivated or snuffed out. Certain life experiences (our upbringings, our parent’s behavior and beliefs, etc.) can impact the willpower we may have been born with from a very early age. But I also learned that anything “unlearned” can be “re-learned.”

Isn’t it comforting to know that we weren’t BORN lazy?

So, how do we “learn” willpower?  How do we reactivate our drive to succeed?

It’s all in the mind. (Yes, I know – I know). You’re thinking, “here she goes again with that ‘taking thoughts captive’ stuff.”

But, you’ll be happy to know that today I have some PRACTICAL APPLICATION for you:

Leadership and organizational consultant Hal Resnick says that willpower is like a muscle. In fact, about a year ago Resnick wrote about the “locus of control,” a viewpoint that describes people as being on a continuum (or a long line, like a timeline) that puts “internality” on one end and “externality” on the other.

This concept was developed in 1954 by psychologist Julian Rotter.

Resnick says willpower can be learned AND we can make it a habit — Okay, great. But to make something a habit, doesn’t that mean you have to actually HAVE it, or at least be doing it to begin with. Habits don’t just form out of thin air.  So what if we don’t have much willpower now? How do we get it? 

Resnick says this:

Developing willpower
It can be simple to develop willpower, according to Resnick.
First, like all habits, the first step is to learn how to do it.
“Learning how to do it means planning and practicing the response. The most successful approach to developing a habit calls for a detailed implementation plan,” he wrote.
An unsuccessful habit might be the decision to go to the gym three times a week. A successful habit would include the specific days, times and a pre-planned workout routine.
It also would include keeping a record of the results, with the satisfaction of seeing the progress being made, he wrote.
“Set the cues and prepare the response. Make sure the cue is defined – such as automatically flossing as part of the ritual of getting ready for bed. Then be sure the reward – feeling that everything is done – is part of the process,” he wrote.
For example, parents who teach their children to come home from school, have a snack and then immediately complete their homework before they are allowed to play are developing a very positive habit, including the delay of gratification to do their schoolwork before playing.
“Establishing the willpower that there is no play until all the homework is done builds a keystone habit. The reward is multifold: the satisfaction of knowing the schoolwork is done; feeling fully prepared for school the next day; perhaps hopefully recognition from parents; and now the ability to play without interruptions or worry about homework that is not yet done,” Resnick wrote.
The next step in developing willpower is consistent practice.
“Willpower, like any other muscle, must be practiced to get stronger,” he wrote.
Inconsistent practice or application will not work. Consistency is not perfection because everyone slips up now and then, but immediately resuming the program reinforces the development of the habit.

Believing in willpower

Resnick wrote there is one last factor that must be incorporated into the willpower equation, the “fundamental belief that we can control our behaviors.”
For a habit to become successfully ingrained, there must be a belief the habit will generate the desired reward,” he wrote.
“Belief is the final and essential component of developing willpower, that staying the course will create the desired results,” he wrote.
“Developing the willpower to stay the course even in the midst of crisis … is the hallmark of the truly successful person and organization.

So there you have it. Scientifically, we CAN learn to control our behaviors. We CAN learn to have willpower. Ironically, we need the WILL to learn WILL.

I’m definitely going for it. I hope you’re going for it too — after all, we’re all in this thing together.

And one FINAL thought – the above is another instance of science backing a lesson that scripture has been teaching us all along.

Love in Him,

Tylie

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New Stuff, New Challenges

I have some exciting news! First of all, we're making lots of exciting strides this year. We are incorporating new departments, new products and new staff members as Virtue continues to grow rapidly. As I work through the details of these changes, I'm finding the new challenges to be fun, but somewhat overwhelming at the […] Read More

I have some exciting news! First of all, we’re making lots of exciting strides this year. We are incorporating new departments, new products and new staff members as Virtue continues to grow rapidly.

As I work through the details of these changes, I’m finding the new challenges to be fun, but somewhat overwhelming at the same time. Facing new challenges is all part of being in a position of leadership, but, every time I start to get stressed out, I’m reminded that I gave this company to God when we opened it, and come what may, He has the reins (I’m a leader, but I’m also a follower). I am a firm believer that if more business owners would invite God into their workplaces, we could see an actual economic shift because of our efforts; but that’s not the point of this post.

This post is about challenges. Some challenges are forced upon us, others are entered into by choice — or divine inspiration. I can’t say that I know for sure everything I do with Virtue is divinely inspired. In fact, we have seen some trial and error over the last couple years that has made quite the opposite enormously obvious. I never KNOW for sure what a decision will beget down the road. However, I do know that God has the reins, and I allow His word to influence every decision I make for the company — so even if I (as in the human, fleshly, hot mess I am) mess something up, either in the implementation or the operation, it’s got no bearing on the fact that Virtue is God’s company on the whole.

Do I make impulsive decisions sometimes? Yes. Do I forget things or make errors? Of course. Do I ever try to make a move without acknowledging God’s control of every outcome? No — not anymore. I used to, but I’ve since learned that by allowing my business to be in God’s hands, I suffer A LOT less stress and I tend to make BETTER DECISIONS because I’m more at peace about taking big steps that the human me probably wouldn’t go for on her own. In all reality, letting God have my company has not only been good for the company, but it’s been good for me too. It’s made me bold. It’s made me brave. It’s made me SET THE BAR HIGH because that’s what HE wants. He didn’t call any of us to be mediocre in our faith. For me, dreaming big in !my business is an exhibition of my desire to be MORE THAN MEDIOCRE.

So yes, new stuff means new challenges – but God didn’t give me the spirit of fear and I will not let fear keep me from following God as he leads Virtue down a path toward RADICAL SUCCESS! If you’re a person of faith and you’ve been struggling at work, I challenge you to bring your faith into your workplace – whether you’re the business owner or not. No, I’m not saying you should beat your boss with your Bible, but I am saying that you should approach your colleagues and your challenges at work with a mindset inspired by your faith, NOT your ‘business.’ I promise you, if you put God in control of your professional life, you’ll live bigger than you ever thought possible.

Now for my announcement!

Drum roll please!  COMING SOON: VirtueTV!  We’re soon to launch a weekly WEB SHOW!  So exciting!  This web show will consist of a wide variety of topics – including news. There will be more info available about VirtueTV soon – but I’m announcing now cause I’m so darn excited about it!

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Stress In Business – The Someday Syndrome

I typically write a post that is geared toward business here at the Virtue Marketing site, and on the same day, I write one that's a little more personal and more "life applicable" on TylieEaves.com. However, today the post I wrote for TylieEaves.com is 100% applicable here at the VM location. You see, the Someday […] Read More

I typically write a post that is geared toward business here at the Virtue Marketing site, and on the same day, I write one that’s a little more personal and more “life applicable” on TylieEaves.com.

However, today the post I wrote for TylieEaves.com is 100% applicable here at the VM location. You see, the Someday Syndrome is alive and well in business; whether you work in an office or you work from home.

I invite you to read the post on by clicking the excerpt below.  Hopefully it will help you as you get your awesome 2014 underway!

For example, many people get stressed out by traffic. They KNOW they can’t do anything about it, they know they can’t control the comings and goings of every person on the road, yet they become all white-knuckle, squinty-eyed crazy when they hit the highway.

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Work Life vs. Home Life – The Epic Struggle

There's a common misconception all over the United States, and very likely the world, that business life and personal or home life must compete for balance. We constantly struggle to find "balance" between our two worlds as though they're home to two different people. It is likely true that each "world" has varied characteristics and […] Read More

There’s a common misconception all over the United States, and very likely the world, that business life and personal or home life must compete for balance. We constantly struggle to find “balance” between our two worlds as though they’re home to two different people. It is likely true that each “world” has varied characteristics and responsibilities, but the meat of the matter lies in the fact that we each have only ONE life.

In my opinion, people everywhere would find lots more peace if they would just ACCEPT the fact that we are each more than “just” our work, or “just” our duties at home. We are each so much more than “just” anything and everything. Never, ever use the word “just” do describe yourself. By its very definition “just” is an adjective that means “merely.” You are MERELY nothing, you are SO MUCH MORE THAN MERELY and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Let me put it to you this way:

You only have ONE life, and you only have so much time to make that one life all it can be. No matter how hard you try, you cannot compartmentalize your one life. The more you try, the more stressed out you’ll become trying to find balance that doesn’t really exist. No matter how hard you try, your work will come home with you on some level, or vice versa — and rightly so. After all, most people (if they work outside the home) will spend more time with coworkers than they will with family throughout the course of their lives. I’m sure you know this, but some people don’t LOVE their work – how miserable would those people be if thoughts of their families, friends, hobbies, et. cetera, didn’t accompany them at work?

Over and again I’ve heard the phrases “it’s just business, nothing personal.” I’ve read it in books, heard it in movies, I’ve heard it in real life – but believe you me, for the person on the receiving end of said exchange, things are VERY personal.

YOU ONLY HAVE ONE LIFE, your business, your family, your hobbies, and hopefully your faith are all part of that ONE life.

Stop trying to separate one from the other. Stop ignoring the fact that business is personal for someone… for everyone. Stop telling yourself that there’s something wrong with overlapping the points of your life. STOP TAKING THE HUMANITY OUT OF BUSINESS.

I firmly believe that if we all started living our ONE life to the fullest, and dumped every “compartment” of our existence into the ONE life we have, we’d see more success, more happiness at home and at work, more peace and even more money. Yes that’s right, more money.

Such a change is totally possible, and it’s entirely up to you – because this kind of change starts within each of US. Accepting the wholeness of our lives starts in our own minds and migrates to our hearts and our bodies. You don’t have to change the way you behave at work or at home, you just have to change the way you THINK about those two parts of the whole. Give yourself a break. Don’t feel guilty for loving what you do, who you are and where you’re going.

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